Issue 50: The Sewer Den's Day Off

Faking out your parents with a phony fever? Need a mental break from the mundane office environment?? Has sickness struck, confining you to your home???

Kids, students, adults - everyone needs a day off. Whether you're at the mercy of an illness or pulling a Ferris Bueller, skipping your normal routine for a restful day on the couch is rejuvenating. Sink into the cushions and embrace the day - your day off.

How does one spend their sick day in The Sewer Den? I've gathered the best mutated gear for fighting or fabricating an illness.


Everyone has their theories on how to kick a cold, but I believe, movies are the key to recovery. The cinematic story provides a mental escape. For me, sick day = movie marathon.

The Heroes In A Halfshell have 5 films & 4 TV series to chose from. Which one is best for a day off? Well, that depends on the severity of your sickness. A few of these titles will heal, but a couple others may cause your condition to worsen...

There's a Nickelodeon TMNT-branded chicken noodle soup that recently hit supermarket shelves. But canned soup never conquers a cold. It's the homemade magic that is the elixir. Get creative and whip up a bodacious bowl for yourself - complete with a dose of Turtle Power.

Combine chicken, veggies, and broth with the pasta from Kraft's TMNT Macaroni & Cheese and you're set.

Dine on turtle soup...Homemade Turtle Kraft Macaroni Chicken Noodle Soup.

There's no one to impress on your day off. Classmates and colleagues are nonexistent - it's just you and the couch. Go for the gratification and robe up.

A hood, pockets, and Turtle Power. What else could you ask for? I feel like TMNT royalty in this robe. Bow down.

*This was an awesome Christmas gift from my great friends, Patrick, Katelyn, Arleen & Pat (a.k.a. Nerd Out With Me). Gratitude, dudes!

Comfort is key when you're taking a day off. There needs to be a constant level of coziness while nestling into your couch or bed. Lounge pants provide the ultimate cure.

I recommend a darker color. That way, if you lazily spill soup or snack crumbs fall into your lap, it's no biggie. It's your day off! Don't waste time worrying about stains.

If you're legitimately sick, expect to bury your stuffy nose inside a bed of tissues. It's the only hope for a leaky shnozz. And even if you're faking an illness, tissues are a valuable prop for your performance. They are a symbol of sickness - keeping you away from school or work and on the couch.

They might be decades old, but these original TMNT tissues are still usable. Totally tubular nose blowing.

You might be wondering how sunglasses made it on here. A set of shades can be your best friend when you're under the weather - coming through in a pinch.

Easily hide your bloodshot eyes or stop those pesky sunbeams from making your migraine worse.

They also allow you to slip into Weekend At Bernie's-mode. Let people think you're a fully-functioning person despite feeling dead inside. Who says being sick can't be fun? These shades will make you come alive!

Usually, I end The Sewer Den posts with a thoughtful conclusion - tying up an entry with a nice little bow. But in the spirit of a sick day, I'm going to be lazy. I leave you with a quote from Ferris Bueller's Day Off that sums it up perfectly.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I can't come to the door right now. I'm afraid that in my weakened condition, I could take a nasty spill down the stairs and subject myself to further school absences. You can reach my parents at their places of business. Thank you for stopping by. I appreciate your concern for my well-being. Have a nice day!"


  1. Thanks for all the suggestions! These work for snow days too, and with this blizzard, I'll be snowbound for the next day or two. By the way, there are four TMNT TV shows. Let's not forget Next Mutation. :)

    1. You're right, the timing of this is perfect. Blizzards give us another opportunity for a day off.

      And thanks for reminding me about Next Mutation! I fixed the post. My mind must have blocked it out that painful series. That one has the potential to make you sick!

    2. I worked from home today, but after work, I watched a few episodes from the 2003 series, and I read most of the Tales Of The TMNT comics from the 80's. And I wore a TMNT T-shirt and pajama pants all day. Thanks for the inspiration to enjoy my snow day in style!

  2. Tell me, what are these "days off"? I don't think I've ever heard of them..They sound like fun though. :-p

    That's a great idea using the Turtle's pasta in the chicken soup. All these years, I've been using plain, boring noodles. Never again.

    Anything Turtles, even Next Mutation, beats what they usually play on daytime TV. Most of those shows are incentive for me to get better so I can go back to work.


Forgiveness is divine, but never pay full price for late pizza.

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