The Sewer Den

Issue 33: My Wish List

noreply@blogger.com (JZ) — Sun, 05 May 2013 17:04:00 +0000

ISSUE 33: MY WISH LIST.

Nickelodeon has served up a solid premiere season of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Our favorite reptiles have momentum back on their side. What seems like an endless supply of episodes (in high definition!) has once again brought TMNT merchandise to store shelves. Stand back and take it all in. Does this mean we are on the cusp of another TMNT golden age? Fingers crossed, but that remains to be seen. With at least two more seasons hitting the airwaves, there will be plenty more ninja nonsense from the green guys.

There are other areas to be conquered for a complete Turtles' takeover. There are specific things that proved successful in the past and solidified the Turtles as pop culture icons. If these guys want to relive their glory days, I have a Wish List that will make it happen. This Top Ten is a blueprint to their triumph - tapping into the essence of what kids love about TMNT. Nickelodeon, turn these wishes into a reality, and you've got gold. Nostalgic fans and young guns too.

Ring in a new era of ninja with a blast from the past.
Continue reading, dude »

Issue 32: Cowabunga Clean

noreply@blogger.com (JZ) — Tue, 19 Mar 2013 03:01:00 +0000

ISSUE 32: COWABUNGA CLEAN.

Bathrooms are boring. From place to place, the space doesn't vary much in terms of decor. Bed, Bath, and Beyond can only spruce up your water closet so much. But have no fear, The Sewer Den will roundhouse kick some cool into your bathroom with TMNT accessories.

As we all know, the Ninja Turtles phenomenon took the world by storm back in the late 80's. They conquered the toy market, had a clothing line, and even found themselves in grocery stores. Why not hit the bathroom? I previously showcased a heap of TMNT cleansing gear, but couldn't resist returning to my arsenal. These items may be dusty, but they're sure to keep you squeaky clean!

Continue reading, dude »

Issue 31: Sentimental In The Sewer

noreply@blogger.com (JZ) — Sun, 10 Feb 2013 17:44:00 +0000

ISSUE 31: SENTIMENTAL IN THE SEWER.

Roses are red, violets are blue, the sewers are sweet, so please read this through.

Pucker up, Valentine's Day is here once again - throwing pretty flowers, tasty chocolates, and mushy greeting cards all over the month of February. In the past, The Sewer Den has covered 2 sets of TMNT Valentine's Day cards - the classic cartoon series of the 80's and their latest movie released in 2007. Although hailing from completely different TMNT eras, both sets featured our heroes shelling out their hearts while using a variety of silly expressions and wretched puns. With Valentines like these, it's understandable why these mutants are single.

Continue reading, dude »

Issue 30: Gratitude, Dude.

noreply@blogger.com (JZ) — Tue, 15 Jan 2013 04:50:00 +0000

ISSUE 30: GRATITUDE, DUDE.

Well, it's over. Once again the holiday season has come and gone. Santa took his annual trip down the chimney, the menorah burned bright, and we all rang in the new year. Time to look ahead and embrace what 2013 has to offer. But before grabbing the bull by the horns, let's look at what new TMNT goodies made their way to The Sewer Den during the holiday season. I must have been incredibly good this year because Santa was especially generous. My friends and family certainly weren't penny-pinching. The end of the year brought on an onslaught of ninja gifts - heaps of TMNT gold were thrown into The Sewer Den collection. If my sincere "thank you's"weren't enough in person, let's strike up another stroke of gratitude right here.

Continue reading, dude »

Issue 29: Collecting Cool

noreply@blogger.com (JZ) — Sun, 23 Dec 2012 06:13:00 +0000

The Sewer Den, the room where my collection of TMNT goodies are on display, has sprouted from an exciting idea into a major success. Not long ago, my Ninja Turtles treasures were stowed away in a dingy basement, out of sight and gathering dust. But now, these prized-possessions have morphed from hoarded nostalgia into priceless trophies - on display for the world to enjoy.

The stockpile of TMNT valuables has eaten up the vast majority of wall space. From floor to ceiling, the green machines reign supreme. The Ninja Turtles lived gloriously in their heyday - hailed as a phenomenon from the late 80's to mid 90's. Most of my collection is from this golden era. But in 2003, the brothers returned to TV for an encore. Their new series proved successful and my TMNT collection continued to grow as a result. With new episodes, came new purchases. When that cartoon ended in 2009, my TMNT collection found stability. The Ninja Turtles went back into their shells, and in some ways, I did too.

Continue reading, dude »

Issue 28: Turtle Tapes

noreply@blogger.com (JZ) — Fri, 30 Nov 2012 00:22:00 +0000

Do you remember that feeling? It was just a simple push of a button, but it was the most tedious of tasks. Occasionally it was quiet, but usually the thing mimicked a fighter jet taking off in your living room.

Rewinding a VHS tape. A process that would leave the kids of today dumbfounded. It was sad ritual that wasted countless moments of your life during the 1980's to the mid 90's. If you were fancy, you had one of those high-tech tape rewinders to save some time. But if you were like me, you were spooling those VHS tapes in your struggling VCR.

Continue reading, dude »

Issue 27: Monsters and Mutants

noreply@blogger.com (JZ) — Fri, 05 Oct 2012 03:01:00 +0000

Trick-or-treat. Halloween is the ultimate opportunity to get your ghoul on. Not into the scary stuff? Fear not, this holiday is for everyone. From pumpkins to princesses, you can don any costume your heart desires.

There was never any question about it for me. A few snips from a piece of cloth, maybe a hint of green face paint, and the costume was born. For that one glorious day each year, I was a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle.

Continue reading, dude »

Issue 26: Eat Up, Dude (Part 3)

noreply@blogger.com (JZ) — Fri, 31 Aug 2012 02:38:00 +0000

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If your tummy is rumbling for some Ninja Turtles snacking, The Sewer Den has got you covered once again. Eat Up, Dude - Part 1 whet your appetite and Eat Up, Dude - Part 2 delivered a sensational second dish. Still got room in your food basket? Well, sink your teeth into another helping and get your Ninja Turtles grub on.

Continue reading, dude »

Issue 25: Top Ten - A Turtle Tribute (Part 2)

noreply@blogger.com (JZ) — Fri, 27 Jul 2012 14:48:00 +0000

The original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie was an instant classic and a box office success story. I've already given my Top Ten reasons why the movie is unbeatable. So when the time came to cook up a sequel, what did the Turtles come up with?

Continue reading, dude »

Issue 24: Summertime

noreply@blogger.com (JZ) — Sun, 01 Jul 2012 20:42:00 +0000

School's out for summer, kids. It's finally time to soak up some rays and take a dip in the pool. My collection of TMNT-themed goodies have always covered the holidays and special occasions throughout the year - and the summer season is no different. Straight out of winter hibernation, I have a few Turtle-toys in The Sewer Den that have had their fair share of playtime during the dog day afternoons of summer.

Continue reading, dude »

Don't Panic

noreply@blogger.com (JZ) — Fri, 18 May 2012 03:11:00 +0000

Don't fret, The Sewer Den hasn't closed up shop. From the bottom of my Ninja-loving heart, I apologize for the lack of TMNT-related stories over the past few weeks.

But, my moments of Sewer-silence come with a solid excuse. A few years back, I wrote and directed an independent feature film entitled, Sneakers & Soul. The film was a passion project that came straight from the heart.

The Ninja Turtles don't make any cameos, but the Sneakers & Soul is still something special in the world of cinema. After a very successful festival run and taking home numerous awards, Sneakers & Soul is finally hitting the small screen. This week, the film was made available at Prescreen.com for an exclusive, pre-release viewing opportunity. Although the film launches later this summer on iTunes, Amazon, Netflix, and various other digital platforms, Prescreen.comgives audiences a chance to discover the magic of Sneakers & Soulbefore its official release.

The usual banter will soon return to The Sewer Den. But until then, Sneakers & Soul is only a click away! Watch the trailer, rent the flick, spread the word.

Issue 23: Three-Pointer

noreply@blogger.com (JZ) — Thu, 22 Mar 2012 04:09:00 +0000

March Madness. Fill out your bracket, watch the games, and keep your fingers crossed. There's not much else you can do. But this year, you're in for something special. The Sewer Den has three basketball-inspired TMNT items that are a merchandising slam dunk. Let's start the clock…

Continue reading, dude »

Issue 22: Awesome Art

noreply@blogger.com (JZ) — Tue, 13 Mar 2012 05:09:00 +0000

If these walls could talk…

If these walls could talk, the walls of The Sewer Den would be quite chatty. What would they say exactly? I like to think they'd be proud - going on and on about their extensive collection of Ninja Turtles-themed artwork. These walls would probably be eager to give history lessons on their artwork - spouting interesting anecdotes and heartwarming tales.

But alas, these walls cannot talk. Luckily, I do. So let me dive right into this collection of artwork. And to the walls of The Sewer Den, I know you cannot talk, but maybe you can read. So if you're reading this, I hope I am doing justice to all the awesome artwork you proudly display.

This issue is appropriate too. I mean, com'on, the Turtles were named after four, famous renaissance artists after all.

Continue reading, dude »

Issue 21: Cupid Circa 2007

noreply@blogger.com (JZ) — Sun, 12 Feb 2012 23:07:00 +0000

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Love is in the air and the green machines are taking a big whiff. Each year the Ninja Turtles spout off sentiments of love in the form of Valentine’s Day cards. What they lack in romanticism, they make up for in humor. Last year, The Sewer Den covered a variety of Valentines from the early 1990’s, showcasing the Turtles (and their eye rolling humor) from the original cartoon series.

Cupid’s arrow has struck once again. With each new Ninja Turtles series or film, the world is treated with another line of TMNT-themed Valentine’s Day cards. This year, we’re taking another trip down memory lane. But, not quite as far back this time around. Rewind 5 years ago to 2007. An iconic year? You bet. After a 14-year hiatus from the silver screen, the Ninja Turtles returned to cinemas with their bandannas a-blazing. In 2007, our heroes made their comeback in TMNT. The fun flick opened number 1 at the box office that weekend of March 23^rd. And do you know what Ninja Turtles success means? More Ninja Turtles merchandise.

Continue reading, dude »

Issue 20: Top 10 Mutants

noreply@blogger.com (JZ) — Wed, 01 Feb 2012 06:22:00 +0000

Merchandising. Forget that the Ninja Turtles had a TV show and a few movies, they made their sweet bucks selling a haul of silly goods. A typical day for a kid in the 90's was surrounded by the madness at every turn. You woke up in your green pajamas, followed by a bowl of nutritious Ninja Turtles Cereal for breakfast, then off to school with your TMNT-themed lunchbox, eventually returning home to eat dinner off your Raphael plate, and then finally you would find yourself drifting into sleep between your comfy Ninja Turtles bedsheets. It was fun for sure, but to the parents it must have been exhausting.

Continue reading, dude »

Issue 19: Goodnight Turtle

noreply@blogger.com (JZ) — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 17:23:00 +0000

Going to bed. It was the worst thing your parents could make you do as a kid. Any opportunity to stay up just a tad later and avoid a visit from the Sandman was always a treat. But when that unfortunate time came, when you unwillingly had to be tucked into bed, was there any saving grace?

Yes. Yes, there certainly was. Mine came in the form of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles bedsheets. They provided comfort both physically and mentally for a seven year old me. And when that time to go to sleep finally did roll around, I'd rest my head on those TMNT pillowcases, flick on the nightlight, and let my dreams take me into the night...

Decades later, the sheets still fit and the nightlight still burns bright in The Sewer Den. Here's a look at some magical TMNT items for bedtime and beyond.

Continue reading, dude »

Issue 18: Ho Ho Ho, Dudes

noreply@blogger.com (JZ) — Fri, 23 Dec 2011 03:29:00 +0000

Tis the season. And what a crazy season it is. Between the shopping, traveling, and every Christmas tradition in between - the holidays are a busy time of year. But, despite the hustle of the season, there is always one thing I manage to squeeze in - trimming the Christmas tree.

Continue reading, dude »

Issue 17: Top Ten - A Turtle Tribute

noreply@blogger.com (JZ) — Tue, 06 Dec 2011 06:23:00 +0000

It's been 21 years since the original Ninja Turtles movie hit the silver screen. The film is old enough to go into a bar and order a drink.

I saw the film twice in the theaters when it was originally released. Once with my Mom and again with my grandfather, good ol' Pop Pop. My Mom was wrapped up in the Ninja-craze, so she knew what she was getting into. But, what did my grandfather think? I'll never know his true thoughts on the film, but I'll always remember he laughed when Donatello spit water in a Foot Soldier's face. One laugh from a grandfather is a success in my book.

Now aged 21 years, how does Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The Movie hold up? Is it like a fine bourbon - absorbing more flavor and charm as it ages? I've been fortunate enough to experience the green machines on the silver screen not only once, not even twice, but three times since my childhood. How did it hold up? Perfect - a true cinematic gem. I mean, com'on...did you expect anything else? But, here's a Top Ten: A Turtles Tribute.

Ten reasons why I still love this movie. And...GO!

Continue reading, dude »

Issue 16: Bodacious Birthdays

noreply@blogger.com (JZ) — Thu, 10 Nov 2011 20:27:00 +0000

Happy Birthday to me. On October 27th of every year, I'm treated to a day of celebration. When I was a young gun in the late 80's and early 90's, a similar birthday invitation went out every year...

These parties were centered around the Ninja Turtles. Plates, napkins, balloons, the cake - Raphael even showed up one year!

But, as the years went on, the Turtles went out. Too cool for TMNT, my birthdays took a turn in a new, more mature direction. I'd be lying if I said Raphael was with me this year to blow out the candles on my birthday cake...

But after a long birthday-hiatus, the Ninja Turtles have returned. The recent creation of The Sewer Den has opened the door once again for Turtle, gift-giving opportunities. And boy, it was TMNT gifts galore!

Where these gifts came from remains a mystery to me. Mostly all of them are from the TMNT heyday, which makes them exceptionally special. So what treats was I unwrapping this year? Let's see how I celebrated this birthday...

Continue reading, dude »

Totally Tubular Treasure: Turtle Cycle (New York Comic Con)

noreply@blogger.com (JZ) — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 03:48:00 +0000

New York City. It really is a melting pot. So many people, so much culture. Every day there is something new brewing in this concrete jungle - an event at every turn. But, after almost a decade of residing here, there's one occasion I always seem to miss...

New York Comic Con.

Continue reading, dude »

Issue 15: Radical Recognition

noreply@blogger.com (JZ) — Wed, 05 Oct 2011 22:48:00 +0000

The Sewer Den is an engulfing experience. Not sure what I was expecting when I decided to create a room dedicated to the Ninja Turtles. Can you really expect anything with such an endeavor?

Fame? Fortune? Heck no.

But, the constant re-discovery of distant memories has been rewarding. Digging up the past can be fun. And The Sewer Den certainly doesn't uncover any skeletons from my closet. Just 20 year old cookies and a few embarrassing photos.

A collection of old memories. That's what I thought The Sewer Den would be. But then, something changed...

New memories. New additions to the collection. How does this happen when I barely make any new purchases? Supporters. Kindness from those who have caught the excitement of The Sewer Den. From the rare few who have witnessed this small, jam-packed room of ninja magic, to the other supporters who have only heard about it up until this point - they've all contributed something wonderful.

This issue is dedicated to you - The Sewer Den Supporters. In no order, all just awesome.

Continue reading, dude »

Issue 14 - Eat Up, Dude (Part 2)

noreply@blogger.com (JZ) — Tue, 16 Aug 2011 05:21:00 +0000

Summer. It's an unstoppable force. Upon arrival, it dives straight into your soul and there is no escape. You can only kick back and have fun. And that's what has happened to me...summer. Packed to the brim with majestic memories and plenty of relaxation, it has been a great one. My only regret, The Sewer Den. Progress has slowed and writings of my collection have come to a halt. My apologies to The Sewer Den. But have no fear! Summer will soon come to a close.

Continue reading, dude »

Totally Tubular Treasure: Sneaker Snappers!

noreply@blogger.com (JZ) — Sun, 10 Jul 2011 18:09:00 +0000

This column will showcase my random discoveries of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles merchandise. Despite the extensive amount of items collected in my childhood, I find myself making Turtle-themed purchases in my adult life as well. Totally Tubular Treasures highlights just that.

Unopened and still as pointless as they were back in the late 80's - Sneaker Snappers! Their purpose?

Continue reading, dude »

Issue 13: Button Up

noreply@blogger.com (JZ) — Wed, 15 Jun 2011 04:09:00 +0000

Some heroes get purple heart medals, others get a Ninja Turtles button.

It's hard to understand the logic of a button collection. After pinning a few to your shirt, they start to look tacky. So what makes them so popular? Is it the freedom of expression with no real commitment? Or maybe it's because they're just so silly and fun.

Either way, the Turtles had a slew of them on the market. The Sewer Den buttons up.

Continue reading, dude »

Issue 12: Punk'd

noreply@blogger.com (JZ) — Mon, 23 May 2011 05:24:00 +0000

Casey Jones: "Hey, what are you, some sort of punker?"

Raphael: "Huh?"

Casey Jones: "I hate punkers...especially bald ones with green make-up who wear masks over ugly faces..."

(a scene from the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles flick)

Within the first few minutes of the film, Casey Jones mistakenly believes Raphael to be a punk - a dedicated follower of punk rock music. Punk rock is defined as:

"A form of hard-driving rock 'n' roll originating in the 1970s, characterized by harsh lyrics attacking conventional society and popular culture, and often expressing alienation and anger."

Perhaps Casey was right in classifying Raphael as a punk. He wasn't the only one...the world always put the Ninja Turtles in this boat. When they weren't doing their infamous Ninja Rap with Vanilla Ice, the green machines embraced the spirit of the punk rock music. Perhaps this was a byproduct of their existence in the late 80's/early 90's era, but just look at the quick facts...

Continue reading, dude »